Letter To Ammon

(on his second birthday/death anniversary...)

Ammon My Son,

How I wish you were here. It is two years ago today since we were together. Those brief moments that we got to share are still etched on my mind. Your life on this earth was so very short, and yet those moments we spent together have changed who I am in ways that are hard to describe.

I've been a Father before and since, for your Brothers and Sister, but that day I learned the hardest part of what it means to be a father. I learned what it means to have to say goodbye to a precious child. I have thought long about that day and those precious moments holding you in the palm of my hand. I've wondered what might have been. I've thought how things could have been different. I've felt you near when the memories wanted to overcome me. And I feel you now as I remember that day.

If you were here now you would be nearing your 2^nd birthday. I 'm sure you would be just walking and beginning to talk. We would be playing together, and your smile would be the light of our home! How I have wished those things for you. But your purpose in our lives was a different one. God had a greater purpose for you, one that is still unfolding. My memories of you motivate and guide me now. Being your father helps me be a better father for your siblings. My desire to see you again guides my actions so that I may be worthy of that blessing.

I named you Ammon because I knew you had a great mission to perform. Just like Ammon of old I am sure that you are now serving that mission and blessing so many others by that service. When my thoughts turn to you this knowledge turns my sorrow to joy and lifts my spirits.

Where you are now, you can see the end from the beginning. There, in the presence of our God, you know with a certain knowledge that all of this is for our good and will make us stronger and more united. From My vantage point, veiled from the glory around you, those things are only seen through the eyes of my faith. But for now that is enough. My Love for You and our Faith will see us through and one day we will be together, never to be apart again.

I miss you my Son, but we must get on with that work the Lord has given us to do. Visit me sometimes, that I may feel your spirit near, and I promise to keep your memory fresh in my mind as well. I will Love you Always,

Dad...